If anyone has ever heard of Tamar Braxton then you know about the controversy that she is facing now. She recently filed for a divorce and now her mother and sisters are relieved. Her mother has went on air stating that Tamar's husband has been abusing her and bullying her for years. Domestic Violence is hard for the victim but I think that there is a special kind of pain that witnesses have to endure.
When I was younger I was informed that one of my family members use to get physically abused by her husband (thankfully her husband has since died). When I went to my mother to speak about it I blamed her for not getting her sister out of that relationship. I ended the conversation with "if any of my sisters were to get into an abusive relationship I would do everything in my power to make sure that she gets out". Little did I know that I would end up eating my own words.
My very own sister started to get abused. The woman that I look up to. Who knows my biggest secrets and deepest fears. At first she hit him and he hit her back*. It was only once she swore. If it happened again she swore that she would get out and never turn her back. It was her husband. They share a house and a child. It would be too much work to leave right now.
But it did happen again. This time she was so bruised that she needed to take some days off from work. I was pissed. But I knew that our mother didn't raise a fool so of course she would take her baby and leave. My other sister called the cops.
I told her to leave. But no charges were pressed. I told her that she can't stay with someone who doesn't value her. But she stayed. And there was nothing that I could do but look into the swollen face of my sister and drop my head.
It is a special hell on Earth when we lose control. When we think that we can get people to act accordingly. But in fact all we can do is just sit and watch and hope for the best. It has been years since that incident happened. They are still together and are working on baby number 2. But I still feel hopeless.
Now Evelyn Braxton is speaking up. After years of witnessing abuse. People wonder how come a mother can sit and watch someone hit her child and do nothing. It is because we can't. Unless the victim wants to leave, there is nothing that we can do. We can physically drag the person out of the home where they are getting abused but the victim would end up right back in the same place unless she wants to change. All we can do is tell them how we feel and hope for the best.
So to all my domestic violence victims GET OUT of that relationship. If you can't do it for yourself do it for your family that has to helplessly watch it.
*I do believe that men have a right to defend themselves. Women please DO NOT HIT MEN! They are strong as hell and bigger than us.
