So if you haven't read my previous post by now. You should know that yes I suffer with social anxiety, body dismorphia and yes I am crippled with the disease to please and yes I am a professional self diagnoser . I still haven't written about my social anxiety because I'm just too damn anxious to write about it. Nonetheless, I know that these issues are because I have little confidence but I'm here to tell you how I plan to gain confidence while we are approaching the New Year.
1- I'm on a weight gain/ Get my body right journey
I have actually been on a weight gain journey for about 15 years, to no avail. I also expected to gain weight when I gave birth but that was a total fail. I went back to 110 pounds after giving birth. Since I was literally broke, with no job there was no way that I could spend money on extra food to gain weight. Luckily I started working and with money came food. I managed to gain 7 pounds in a year but my goal weight is 130. Now no offense to those who don't mind a body that is mostly belly but I am obsessed with having a smaller stomach. So as I eat foods high in protein I am doing crunches too.
2-I'm on a thicker hair journey
Now I can say that I have been blessed with hair that grows at a faster pace than most of my loved ones but my hair is chemically processed so it is much thinner as well. Good thing I know how to combat this. Hair vitamins are honestly the way to go. I have used Hairfinity and My GOD has my hair gotten thicker. I used it for 3 months and had to stop because my face broke out like crazy. I am going to use it again but this time I am going to increase my water intake. I also use Emergencee by Nexus after I process or relax my hair which has reduced my shedding.
3- I'm getting my nipples pierced
Yes. I am. As the president of the itty bitty committee I think that a piercing would boost my confidence!
4- I'm spending more money on clothes
Once I pay off my Loan is paid off I would finally be able to afford to buy some new clothes. Not to say that my closet is empty because it isn't but I definitely have 4 pairs of work pants and a couple of shirts. But those pants literally reach up to my calves and I am tired of wearing the same clothes every day. Now I have NEVER been blessed with a closet full of clothes so once I can pay for it cash I will definitely put some money aside for it. Now I will always be against spending less than $30 on pants or a shirt but I will have more of those items in my closet
Now the first four points are because I believe if you look good you feel good! but you also have to feel good inside. So mentally and spiritually:
5-I'm going back to reading a book a week
I have stopped reading as much as I use to mostly because my focus was off.
6- I'm going to eat clean
Ugh I honestly don't know if I am capable of doing this but we shall see. I love unhealthy food and since my body doesn't tell me when to stop eating bad (no weight gain) I just keep on going!
7. I am going to read my Bible and pray more
There is no way that I can forget that Jesus is the reason for my passion and opportunities. I don't want to ever take God's grace and Mercy for granted. It is a journey to get closer to God and I am always on it.
How are you gaining confidence as we approach the New Year?
